People fall in love. To my naïve ears, the phrase used to sound like a one-step action, occurring due to sheer fate or coincidence. He taught me otherwise.
Falling in love is a process, a struggle between me and my beloved. If his love were a well and you were to look inside, there would be no end to its depth. Each sunset, as I reflect at his well, mine grows deeper.
The struggle lies within the paradoxical nature of our love. His love for me is complete and boundless. Mine is finite, but growing. The deeper I fall for him, the higher soars my heart. In my falling, I rise.
The spider ascends, slowly, along the first silver thread of its web. With the slightest movement of light, the thread becomes invisible to the human eye. Yet the thread continues to exist and the spider resumes its unhurried dance. Each creature is on its own journey.
A few hours before dawn, when the universe sleeps, I feel the closest to him. He listens to my complaints, my fantasies, my regrets. With his gentle embrace, my insecurities slip away. He is the first and the last one privy to all the buried thoughts within my heart. The only one aware of the exact curves of my body. The feel of my skin. The shape of each of my teeth. The parts of my being that I appreciate and those that I criticize. He assures me that I am perfect, just like his love for me.
During this intimate conversation of two lovers in the final moments of darkness, lightning strikes. The hairs on my arm stand up in distress. My beloved holds me tight as the fresh smell of rain envelops us. He promises that the first ray of sunlight is near.
Allah, my beloved, my Creator, my One and Only God, has hundreds of beautiful names. One of my favorites is Maalika Riqqi, the Master of my Freedom.
Imam Hasan Al-Mujtaba (peace and blessings upon him and his family) was once asked, “What is the distance between the Heavens and the Earth?” He replied, “The cry of an oppressed person in supplication.”
On this sacred 23rd day of Ramadan, “Ya Maalika Riqqi, free us from the chains that we have built, shackling us to vain pursuits. Teach us to drown in your love, for in this drowning lies our salvation. This upcoming year, let your two angels keep us ashore, the left arm supported by your final Book, the right arm by your final Prophet and his family.”